My impossible love story.

It's Valentine's Day!

So I've spent tonight reflecting on my love story.

My love story is impossible.  It's impossible for a hundred reasons, not least of all is that I didn't really believe in love stories.

Yet here I am, living a love story, an amazingly beautiful love story.

Some people say they see their future in the eyes of their future spouse.  I didn't see my future, I could never have imagined the journey we would take and I don't see what will come next.  But what I did see, and what I still see, is unconditional love.


Gavin, I can't express my gratitude that I've found you and that you love me.  Thank you for building a beautiful family with me and thank you for helping to writing an amazing love story.

4th anniversary reflections on my Marriage.

Almost a week ago, we 'celebrated' our wedding anniversary.

I say 'celebrated' because it's at minimum unconvetional to celebrate a wedding anniversary watching Buster Balloon, visiting the pediatrian, attending swim lessons and making a middle of the night drive to Las Vegas for a bachlor party.

As I wrote that, I had to smile.  These are the 'work horse' years of our marriage.

Our 'honeymoon phase' started before we got married.  We traveled, spent long nights talking, ate fancy dinners, dreamed about the future, dotted on each other and worked through some very serious issues.  Then we settled into the comfort of each other.

These are the work horse years because life with babies is hard work.  Our conversations often revolve around what someone did or didn't eat or eliminate.  Our texts are less flirty and more functional.  For example, I remember texting Gavin that I missed him almost every morning when we were dating.  This morning, I texted him that I thought the milk was bad, to please sniff it before giving it to Colin.... romance at it's finest!

It won't always be this way.  Someday our babies won't need our full time+ attention and we'll have more time for romance.  In the meantime, I know that Gavin calling the insurance company for me is as much or more of an expression of love as a surprise necklace from Tiffany's or a multi course meal by candle light.  It's also not an excuse for me to ignore my marriage or forget how important it is.  It's just a realization that things are different.

While phrases froom frames in Kohl's don't often summarize my feelings, I can't help but look at our family and our home sometimes and think "All because two people feel in love."

Gavin, I love you.  Happy Anniversary.

A Day for Daddy

Things are still chaotic around here.

So Father's Day this year was a laid back event.

Although that picture is a lie, daddy only got to relax for a few minutes in the middle of the chaos that is adjusuting to our growing family.

Thank you daddy for loving our relaxed celebration at home.  There are too many things to thank you for to list them all here.  We love you and we are so very lucky to have you!

Date night: Home Edition

We are still faithfully planning and executing our monthly date nights.

January:  Irvine Spectrum.  We were unaware that visiting the Irvine Spectrum on a Friday night, we would be among the oldest people in the crowd.  Since it was my birthday, we bought me a new diaper bag (which I still love) and ate some Japanese food.

February: Brunch @ Coffee, Tea and Tulips.  In February, Gavin researched well reviewed brunch restaurants nearby and we ended up here.  I've walked past it a bunch of times because it's in the Micheal's shopping center.  The food was good, and we had a great time watching the worst rain storm of the season.

March:  Barnes and Noble.  We realized that one of the things we don't ever do anymore is browse.  With a toddler in tow, shopping is more about survival than enjoyment.  Since we are still doing on book club, we thought it would be a nice date to just go and wander around a book store and get ideas and hang out.  Strangely, we didn't buy any books.  I'm sure that's at least partially due to our reliance on e-books and audio books, but we both picked up a few good ideas.

April: Home Date

When I sat down to look at our April Calendar, a date night was looking a little difficult to fit in.  Our normal date night sitter (Grandma) is off on an exotic two week vacation, and we had several NOT date night activities (like doing our taxes and church services) that we were already using a babysitter, so I decided it was time to pull out a home date night.

I decided the key to making a home date night successful was to make sure it didn't feel too ordinary.  For me, that mostly means special music, special lighting, and forgoing our normal evening routines (that's the hardest one!)  It also means setting aside the time beforehand to get things planned and ready.  While it didn't take too long, I think the extra planning helped make it feel like an event instead of just an evening at home. (Although both are nice!)

We fed Colin and put him down and then made our dinner of Salmon and Mashed potatos.  We had a great time cooking and eating together.

The original plan was a movie, but I am self aware enough to realize there was no way I was going to be able to stay awake for a movie, so we played a game instead.  We bought some of our favorite candy and played "Pandemic"  It's a cooperative game and we had a great time.

I am so grateful for the relationship I have with my husband.  Having children, especially the long road to get here, has been challenging on our marriage, and I'm so glad we both still have the love and energy to put in to making this stage of marriage sustainable, but also fun.  I love you, Gavin!

Date Night, 2013=Success

In 2013, one of my goals, and one of our family's goals was for Gavin and I to have a date night at least once a month.  At the start of 2013, Colin was barely a month old and it seemed like it would be a very challenging goal to achieve.  The idea was to have an 'actual date' (meaning going out of the house and doing something together) but I did hedge and come up with a few back up plans we could do at home, just in case.

We successfully had a date night out together every month in 2013!!

I already wrote about many of them here and here.

September:  In September we had our very first overnight date!

October:  Carnival Cruise Evening Out

In October, we took a cruise with my parents.  We took advantage of our adjoining rooms and left our sleeping baby to climb around exploring the boat (including the adults only area, not as exciting as it sounded...) and reenacting parts of Titanic. We had recently found out we were pregnant again, so my wished for tropical drink was just a Shirley Temple. :)

November:  Arroyo Trabuco

We had originally planned to go to Flemming's Steak house for dinner.  But we didn't make reservations and when we called, they had a very long wait and no tables.  We ended up eating at Arroyo Trabuco's restaurant.  We love their Sunday brunch, but we were disappointed with our dinner.  Still, we had great conversation and it was nice to dress up for a date!

December: Great Gift Wrap Up

In December, we made a short trip to Vegas mostly to see my parents.  But we went to the Harrah's Great Gift Wrap up for the first time.  We had so much fun wondering around with calculators adding up the point values for things we had no where near enough loyalty points for!  It was much more fun that I would have expected and in the end, we picked several "Nap" items from Brookstone.

I am really proud of us for accomplishing our goal.  To me, it is a concrete way that we affirm our decision to put a priority on our marriage.  Plus in a rushing, chaotic, beautiful life that often involves conversations that revolve mostly around vomit, diapers, medications, the beauty of pregnancy, and every one's sleep habits, it's nice to have a dedicated 'grown up' time together.

For 2014, we continued this goal and changed it a big by adding a "Griffin Family Book Club."  Gavin and I are taking turns choosing books to read that we discuss completely randomly throughout the month.  I suppose it would be a nice back up if we ever ran out of things to talk about at date night, but it's yet to happen.  I'm so lucky I'm married to my best friend.

Gavin Griffin, TCU Graduate

Goals are a funny thing.  Often they seem so easy to set, and the path is so clear to get to them, until you start down that path. But sometimes as you stagger out of the road less traveled, you realize it was exactly the path for you afterall....

Gavin's journey to his degree was longer and more varied than most.  In total: 14 years, 3 schools, and some pretty major life accomplishments outside of academia.  He met a girl and helped her become what she was meant to be, including a mother.  He walked a very difficult path to becoming a father and is the most involved and loving dad I've ever meet.  He set off on a career that some people dream off, and others can't fathom and not only survived, but excelled, averting the obvious and more subtle pitfalls.  He's set records, travelled the world, and never lost himself in the glitz.  

I couldn't be prouder of him.

Husband, Father, Pet-dad, Uncle, Triple Crown Winner, Professional Poker Player, Writer, trivia buff, golfer, OC Resident, DnD nerd... college graduate is hardly the most impressive on the list, but now it's there!  The first time Gavin and I discussed him finishing his degree, I think he thought it was a pipe dream.  It sounded great, but it also seemed like it would be a huge pain.  Every time we would look into a new avenue, it would seem daunting.  When it would come up, I would encourage Gavin to keep trying.  So he kept taking a few classes.  Eventually we contacted TCU to find out about completing his degree there. Surprisingly, it seemed doable and they worked with us to make it happen.

It certainly wasn't without challenges.  A summer without daddy wasn't easy for anyone.  We are so lucky to have loving and accommodating grandmas to help fill the gap.  For us, the summer flew by: I was really too busy staying afloat to worry much.  We'd set a course and we were all chugging along to the finish line.

Our adventures in dorm living were pretty exciting and funny.  It's unlikely Colin will ever want to livin in a dorm with his mommy again so I cherished the time. <3

Daddy After his last class!

  

Future Frog?

As a peripheral benefit, we now have a college football team to cheer for!  Expect to see a bit more purple here come football season!! (Hopefully, at least....)

Gavin, I am so proud of you.  You started out with a goal, and you achieved it.  I love you, always.  Congratulations!!

Go Frogs!

Chicago Pumpkin Patch

Colin was a lucky little guy and got to visit two pumpkin patches this year!

So many to chose from, but I know which one I'd pick! 

Mommy wasn't feeling well during our outing, so there are limited pictures, but they were too cute not to share.  

Taking to the High Seas!

The blog has been quiet because our world has not!!

We have just returned from a serious of exciting adventures.  The first was a 4 day Carnival Cruise to Catalina and Mexico.

Setting Sail! ( Queen Mary in the Background)

I am not sure we'll ever sail again, especially with Carnival, but it was certainly an adventure!  Lots of eating, family time and eating.  :)

Our Cabin after I decided the provided crib wasn't going to work!

Dancing with Grandma

Dining Room Ceiling

In Catalina

Getting Colin to nap was a challenge, so we took what we could get!

Family Adventure 2013

As usual, mom forgot sunblock so we got to buy it.  It's our most purchased souvenir so far!

Formal Night! 

Cuddles

 

Ensanada (As far as we got before going back!) 

 While I'm not sure cruising will ever be our go to family vacation, we had a great vacation.  It was so nice to have Grandma and Grandpa around to help out and we are so lucky to have such an easy going, willing to eat anything (and everything!) baby.

Date Nights, continued

I wrote before that one of our goals for 2013 was to have a date night each month.

We've continued to successfully achieve this goal!

We left off in April.

May: Sushi Plantation, Mission Viejo, CA

While Gavin's mom was in town, we decided to take a lunch date to our favorite sushi restaurant!  It was awesome that the sushi chef still remembers us and the food is still awesome.  

June: Green Vally Ranch, Henderson, NV

We were in Vegas, so we decided it'd be fun to head down to Green Vally Ranch and deposit some money into my brand new Ultimate Poker Account.  Only I failed.  My account got messed up and I couldn't deposit money.  We ate at the buffet, which was about like you'd expect.  We couldn't find a pai gow or black jack table that met our specifications (two seats next to each other.)  We did enjoy a drink at Hank's Steakhouse which had a very nice ambiance.  We still had a great time just talking and enjoying each other's full attention.

July: Cheese Cake Factory, Mission Viejo, CA

The Cheese Cake factory is our favorite because of their appetizers and dessert.  So we went for appetizers and desert!  It was a perfect low key evening out and a great opportunity to catch up.

August:  Downtown New Braunfels, New Braunfels, TX: Worst date night to date

Since we didn't have a chance for a date on our anniversary, we decided it'd be fun to take one while my family was vacationing at my sister's place.  We usually like pretty low key dates where we can catch up.  My sister recommended a fun bar, but when we arrived it was a bit boisterous for our date night needs.  We set out to find a quiet table.  We did eventually find one, but the restaurant, which we thought was just dark to set a scene, was apparently closed.  The staff was eating at the bar and it wasn't nearly as quiet and peaceful as we'd hope.  We still had fun talking, although on the way home we decided it was our least successful date.  Then I got a speeding ticket.  Officially worst date night ever.

We do our best to take time for each other whenever we can, but having our date nights to look forward to each month has been awesome.  We are also very lucky that we have regular visits from Grandma and Buma that allow us to sneak away without much planning or coordination.  I hope this tradition sticks!

 

Three Whole Years

I can believe it's been three years.  Three years since a day that I was sure could never happen, happened.

I love you.

Father's Day

We are so lucky.  We have the greatest daddy.  I knew Gavin would be a great dad, but he still amazes me with his love, compassion and involvement.  We spent this special father's day in Vegas. 

Hey look dad, two cards!

Helping Dad with his present

Grandpa and his special hand/foot mug

Just like my dad, down to my crazy hair!

Thank you to our daddy.  Thank you for all of the daddies.  It's a full load taking care of babies and mommies! The last half year has been filled with so many moments of Gavin knowing exactly when and how to help me.  The first few days home from the hospital, when I was still figuring out how to feed the baby, he feed me and made sure I always had water within reach.  I never have to ask him to take care of the baby and if I need a break, he knows before I do and he's there before I realize it.  

We love you daddy!