Show me what Love Sees, reflections for Mother's Day.

It's been a bit emotional at our house. As I struggle to seek that perfect balance of mom, wife, engineer, incurbator, friend, hostess, organizer, decorator, I start to drown a bit in the details.  I'm mostly too tired lately to really take stock of my progress or failure, but when I do, I sometimes feel discouraged and frustrated.

I see the piles of mail slowly building.  I see the scratched paint on the stairs, the crumbs in the corner of the kitchen floor, the cat hair on the sofa.  I see the work task list long and unfinished next to the not started professional development list.  I see the goal of thanking my husband left unchecked yet again.  I see my well intentioned art projects for Colin unopened and the pinterest ideas untried.

And if I'm not careful, I quickly see a mounting list of my lifetimes failures and short comings.

I randomly opened a magazine laying on our counter and found this quote:

"Tell me your Story, Show me your wounds.
And I'll show your what love sees, when love looks at you.
Hand me the pieces, broken and burised.
And I'll show your what love sees when love looks at you."

And I stopped to think about it.

When Colin looks at me, his look is full of love  and trust.  He doesn't seem me as the sum of my professional achievements, or my house keeping, or my ability to do everything right.  I'm just mommy.  He sees mommy and he loves me.

Being a mother is the biggest responsibility I've had.  It's a humbling honor and I am so grateful for every moment with my young, growing family.

"Happy Mother's Day, Mommy."

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day!  Valentine's Day isn't usually a big production around our house (although I did create a pretty cool surprise this year!)  And although I suspect that the first few months after having a baby aren't the most romantic time in any relationship, it is wonderful to have this day to reflect on how grateful I am to have my husband.

Australia, 2010

Hawaii, 2009

Our House, 2008

Monte Carlo, 2007

Somewhere between Chicago and Orange county, 2006

Present Day

For every adventure, for every year, for every stage, for every kiss, for every hug, past present and future, thank you Gavin.  I love you, always.

Merry Little Christmas

I found a song with lyrics I could relate to this Christmas, then discovered that the song was changed because it was too depressing and that's why I didn't remember the lyrics. Go figure. The original anyway:

It was a rough year, and a seemingly impossible to survive holiday, but it was still Christmas and I'm still so grateful for all the good I have in my life.

Next year all our troubles will be out of sight?

Thanksgiving

Mid December and I just now get around to posting about Thanksgiving?  

I've lost my umph as it was SO long ago, so just a few pictures and a quick summary:

Table, should have used a brighter table cloth, there's always next year!

Dinner, which I now realize you can't even see in the photo...

Bread Pudding

Dinner:

Butternut Squash Soup

Homemade Wheat Bread

Gavin's family stuffing ( a meal in itself, really)

Sauteed Baby Carrots

Cheryl's Green Bean Casserole

Deviled Eggs by my mom

Fresh Turkey from El Toro Meats

Mom's Apple Cider

Bread Pudding with Canadian Maple Syrup Glaze

Everything came out great and it was a nice day at home cooking with my husband and enjoying my family.  The never frozen turkey turned out fantastic.  I'd certainly recommend it over a frozen turkey any day.

Happy Annivesary to the ground! :)

Sorry, blog readers.  Inside Joke. 

Last weekend was our first wedding anniversary.  It's been a rough year for us, still even the bad times have reminded me that I wouldn't trade our love for anything.  I am also so grateful for our wedding.  There were SO many times during the planning of the wedding that I literally tossed the plans on the floor, picked up my purse and said "That's it, let's go to Vegas."  I am so grateful we didn't.

Now, for all time we have that one perfect day as a representation of our love.  Perfect weather, perfect location, perfect pictures, even perfect snafus.

I love you, Gavin!

As a wedding gift from some very special friends, we received a first anniversary romantic get away to Big Sur.  So last weekend, we packed up the the car and headed to Post Ranch Inn!

Not long after we started dating, Gavin and I drove his car from Illinois to California.  It was a fun trip.  We talked, sang, laughed, and shared our life stories.  This drive equally enchanting (okay, the last hour on the way home was a bit daunting, but other than that amazing).

The hotel was gorgeous, inside and out.  Even the bathtub had an awesome ocean view!

 We had big plans for how we'd spend out days in Big Sur, but with a view from your bed like this:

How do you leave?

So we mostly hung around the property.  We watched the animals, hiked and even saw a deer!

It was pretty funny actually.  We were walking along this trail and I saw a deer very close to us.  We were standing there looking at each other for so long that we figured out it was fake.  Just as I was feeling embarrassed for being duped, it turned it's head walked away.  When we turned the next corner on the trail, it was standing there looking at us again!  It was so beautiful.  I was half convinced it was animatronic.  I'm too Disney, I guess.

Overall, it was a fantastic weekend of nice Champagne, bird watching, relaxing and mostly remembering and celebrating the most important thing in my life, my husband.

Happy Anniversary, Gavin.

What's for dinner? Easter Edition

For Easter, my sister came to visit and we cooked!

I was primarily responsible for the eggs (which came out lovely, although I failed to get a picture.  No idea how that happened!)

My sister made green bean casserole.  Gavin made the mashed potatoes and ham.  We didn't want a whole ham so we just bought already cooked sliced ham and fried it.  It was good and saved us having to suffer through weeks of ham sandwiches or the guilt of throwing them away.

My favorite part of our Easter dinner was our egg surprises. 

Last year, Gavin and I made these when we colored eggs.  We both put things inside for each other.  Both of us put things representing our wedding planning.  I wish I had the material to do it again this year, but there's always next year.  I suspect traditions aren't going to really survive this year, but maybe they'll come around again next year.

Happy Saint Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day. First, of course, to my Valentine; Gavin.  I love you.  I don't need a red heart on my calendar to remind me to tell you that, but I'll take the opportunity to tell the rest of the world. I LOVE THIS MAN.

And Happy Valentine's to you.  Awesome Alyssa made this and I'll share it as my Valentine's gift.

Valentine's Day Gifts

I am making a huge play for aunt of the year again this year.  I couldn't think of a better way to start than with AWESOME Valentine's Day mailboxes!  Sticker personalized for each of my favorite nieces/nephews.

Don't worry, they aren't just adorably cute, they are also stuffed full of awesome candy and souvenirs from Australia.

I don't know any Pirate,smiley face, Tinkerbell, animal, crocodile loving child that wouldn't vote for Aunt Amy!  Happy Valentine's Day, kids!

What's for Dinner? Christmas Edition!

Merry Christmas!  This week was a little crazy with bad weather and the holiday!

A blog about what we had for dinner!  If you want to see our cookbooks, check out the cookbook shelf link at the top my the blog

Monday: Steer n Stein, Victorville, CA 
Terrible weather stopped our trip to Vegas for an interview for Gavin short, but when in Victorville,there's really only one thing to do!  This is probably one of my favorite restaurants.


Tuesday: JoJo's Pizza, Mission Viejo, CA
I wasn't feeling great, so we decided to continue my 'eat comfort food week' theme and I had angel hair pasta with marinara sauce.  Pasta also makes the best leftovers ever.

Veggie Wednesday: Baked Potatoes and Ginger Bread Cookies 
There is a post all about this here.

Thursday:  KFC

Friday: Christmas Eve!  Baked Potato Soup!
We didn't have a proper menu for this week so Friday morning we decided on our meals for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  The soup came out fantastic!  I had mine pureed and Gavin preferred his chunky. 

Christmas Eve

Hers

His

Saturday: Christmas Day, Griffin's Own Surf and Turf BBQ Lamb and Lobster Tails   
Not the conventional Christmas Meal, but man was it delicious!  We've never cooked lobster before and were actually reflecting on how even a year ago we would have refused to even attempt this type of a meal!   It was the perfect meal for our first Christmas as Mr & Mrs!

 

Sunday: Christmas leftovers!
Well in all honesty there isn't much left from Christmas!  But there's some Christmas Eve leftovers and some mashed potatoes!

1st Sunday of Advent

Today is the first Sunday of Advent.  Advent is the beginning of the Catholic Liturgical calendar and marks the beginning of preparation for the Christmas season.  I am not currently Catholic, and I wouldn't call my conversion particularly successful so far, but Gavin and I are still celebrating Advent.  I don't have nearly as many holiday traditions as I would like, and advent gives us the perfect opportunity to develop a few new ones!

Our first project was an Advent Wreath.  Gavin was such a trooper and agreed to head to Micheal's on Black Friday (we went late in the day, don't worry!)  We couldn't find the candle holder we wanted, but we are cleaver and creative and were able to make it work!

I really like that the Advent Wreath seems to borrow from so many different traditions and incorporate them into a Christian celebration of preparation for Christmas.  The general idea is that each Sunday leading to Christmas, we will light one of the candles before dinner on Sunday, culminating in lighting the white candle on Christmas.

I'm not an expect, so for more information on advent, check out this link or just google it :) .

Thanksgiving

A.    Amy.  Yep, I’m grateful for me.  I’m grateful for who I am and who I am becoming.

B.    Bubble Baths.  I’m grateful for the ability to relax in an awesome bathtub will a million little bubbles to cheer me up.

C.    Cuddle blankets-  Enough said.
 
D.    Droooid- Don’t tell Gavin, but I’m grateful for the droid.  I’m grateful I have a phone for work, to keep in touch, to listen to the radio, to play games with friends.  Yep.  I like my Droid.

E.    Elephants- I’m grateful for my education (CSUF=Titans, Titans = Elephant, E not used yet, just go with it).  I’m glad I live in a society where I was able to get an education and can continue to learn and take classes. (I realize Education would have been an easier, albeit less exciting word for this)

F.    My Friends.  I am lucky to have friends who I can call in the middle of the night to say, ‘I’m not crazy, right?’,  or to spend a full day wandering around Ikea with or just sharing life with.

G.    God.  I’m not sure where the best place to find God is yet, and I am not sure when I ever will.  But I’m can’t deny that He has helped me, and I’m grateful.

H.    My husband.  I can’t imagine a more perfect fit for me.  He has proven so many times that he is exactly what I need.


I.    My In-laws.  In addition to finding an awesome person to share my life with, I got the added bonus of a family who loves and cares for me.  I am so grateful for the friendship, support and love I’ve found in them

J.    My Job-  I don’t always love my job, but I’m grateful for it. I’m grateful that I have a meaningful and useful way to use my skills to contribute to the world.  I’m grateful the world is willing to pay me for my contribution.

K.    Kids-  I’m grateful for children.  I’m grateful for their enthusiasm about everything.  Especially my nieces and nephews.

L.    Library-  I’m grateful for the library where I can check out audio books to keep me safe and sane while driving

M.    Music-  I’m grateful to have access to music that can cheer me up, comfort me, or make me dance.

N.    Nights at home.

O.    The Ocean-  I’m grateful for the beautiful view Gavin and I discovered a few weeks ago.

P.    The Present-  I’m grateful for Now.  Even when now isn’t exactly as I wish it were, I’m grateful that I’m alive and healthy and have so many things to be grateful for.

Q.    Quiblar-  I’m grateful for the little nightlight I bought last weekend to cheer me up.  I’m grateful that a 7 dollar toy from Ikea can cheer me up.

R.    Roberts-  I’m grateful for Family.

S.    Sundays-  I’m grateful for a day to catch up and hang out.

T.    Tomorrow-  I’m grateful for the future.  Whatever it holds, I’m grateful I have tomorrow to plan for, look forward to and experience.

U.    The Unexpected-  I’m (usually) grateful for the unexpected.  A letter in the mail, a note or candy in my lunchbox, a rain day in the middle of a hectic week.  I’m grateful life isn’t too predictable.

V.    Video Games-  I’m grateful for a form of entertainment where I can be a famous singer, an assassin, a hero, god, or a Sim.

W.    Whiteboard-   We have a whiteboard in our kitchen with our weekly menu on it.  The whiteboard is great, but really I’m grateful for a husband who is willing to shop, cook and clean with me so we can eat fresh healthy food at home.

X.    Et cetera-  Everything else, my healthy, my car, my safety equipment at work, our house, love, sunsets, Halloween, change, memories, photographs, art, shadows, freeways, email, perception, soda maker…

Y.    Yesterday-  I’m grateful for the past. I’m grateful for it’s role in getting me to where I am today and for teaching me what I needed to learn

Z.    Our Zoo.  I am so happy to have our beasties around to cheer me up and cuddle and run around like crazy to make us laugh

What's for Dinner? Halloween Edition!

I love traditions, but don't currently have very many of them.  One I picked up last year from Emily, was a pumpkin themed dinner every Halloween!

Our Halloween Table!

Of course Halloween, and pumpkin dinner, aren't complete with actual pumpkins as well!

We each made a course (although there was some collaboration for each dish!)  While I understand assigning me to 'beverage' it's a difficult task on Halloween, in general pumpkin does better in non-liquid forms I think.

Salad: Spinach salad with avocado and pumpkin seed in a lime vinaigrette dressing.  Very good use of pumpkin in a still refreshing salad!

Main Course: Pumpkin Ziti  This was a big hit last year so we did it again!  Very good

Transition Dessert: Pumpkin Souffle.  This pretty much tasted like a less sweet pumpkin pie without the crust, aka AWESOME!  It was transition desert because clearly dessert was any candy the trick or treat-ers didn't sneak away with!  It didn't photograph that well...

Drink: Pumpkin Spice Martini, not a huge hit, but drinks with pumpkin not that easy to come by and not that likely to be awesome I think.  Plus, it was very pretty.

Then Candy all night! 

It was the best week ever, but Halloween is always so much fun, especially with good friends and good food.

This is Halloween, this is Halloween!

Halloween!  My favorite time of the year!  I love Halloween.  I love dressing up,  scary movies, trick or treaters, black lace!

This year life got in the way of getting prepared so I didn't finish our original costumes, but we still had a great time!  Matt and Emily came here this year (last year we went to Boston).  This year we took a very different approach and instead of dark and scary went for unique, hence Ying Yang!

It's always fun when Halloween falls on a weekend.  Saturday night we went to a party in Ladera.  There were some great costumes!

 

We also participated in some fun Halloween crafts! :) 

Emily made one of Gavin!

On Sunday we did some pumpkin carving/pumpkin eating, there will be a blog all about it very soon!